This entry is an attempt to try and explain the last entry. I was more frustrated than I've been in a very long time by my situation. But let me explain and maybe you'll see what I mean.
I'm obviously not going to get the computer-at least not for a couple of weeks, maybe as long as a month. There's some kind of backorder on the hard drive, the owner doesn't want to refund my deposit. In all fairness, there is a sign on the wall that states "No Refunds", the hard drive will be here eventually, it's not the stores fault, just my crappy luck. To top it all off, the cable bill wasn't paid, so now there may not even an internet connection to hook up to even if I did have a computer. At least till they pay the bill. But not by me! I don't watch the TV, I don't play with the XBox online or off, so that bill isn't mine.
I've been so frustrated by this situation, that yesterday I just wanted to throw my hands in the air, and inanimate objects at anyone who was in any was remotely involved in this. I was at the point of just giving up. Period. After a day to allow reason to return, I have to amend some of the things that I said. I know that eventually I will get that computer, but right now patience is not a virtue of mine. I may have to set up some sort of internet for myself, even dial-up for the time being, if things aren't paid and turned back on at the house.
I also know that I will be back here writing-eventually. I'm just going to take some time away from here, get myself composed, centered, and some perspective on the whole thing. Going to the library is all fine and good, they don't mind at all, but my whole day is plotted around the library's hours, and of course my work schedules. I can't concentrate when I have to watch the clock so closely, and at the library here in town they're 15 minutes behind....Anyway, it's hard to check email, read journals, do searches, and try to get everything that I want done in the short time that I have.
She's filled her coffee cup, burned her tongue on the first sip, which seems to be a daily ritual, and is heading back to her bedroom. Once inside she knows that she can sit down at her desk, open her laptop and start reading the daily adventures of all her friends and acquaintances in J-Land, take a break, make some toast, get a refill on the coffee, and go back online for awhile, after all it's only 5:30am and she has hours yet before the bulk of her day begins......
Just a little daydream there. Sorry about all the drama and incoherence. See ya soon....
~Thanks for Stopping by~